let's tune out by turning on the radio

Dear Christopher:

I wish I could write all my feelings about you in this letter. I really do. But love... it's so indescribible. This love is a step worse than that. It's as if our love is just that great.

For anyone who reads this, Chris is my boyfriend. Alex's friend... my boyfriend for the past five months. He's just absolutely amazing. My other piece. The other half of me.

It's just a classic case of: Once upon a time, I was so afraid to love you, but now I'm scared shitless to lose you.

That's basically how it is. And sometimes, I feel like I'm putting more into the relationship than he is, and that makes me feel like he's apathetic. And it hurts me. But I don't want to tell him that, because I'm scared that he'll take it the wrong way. It's weird. I can talk to him about so much more than that, but I have a problem like this and BAM. I'm mute or something. It's so bad. I hate it.

But other than that, everything big that could happen in my life has happened. I moved out of my mom's house, mind you I'm 16, I moved in with a friend. I'm officially a senior. And I'm graduating in May. I can't believe my life has changed so much in a little over a month. I'll update as soon as something new comes into my life... I love whoever sits there and reads this. I really do.

-Miranda Jade

(mood: tired, insomniac-like, very VERY sick x| )